A healthy diet is fundamental for development and learning. But many children are picky eaters or have difficulties with food. To help them, it is important to know: What is the role of parents/caregivers? What should you do and what should you avoid? What expectations are realistic?
Children need a variety of foods to get all the nutrients (protein, carbohydrates, fat, vitamins, minerals - except sugar, which is not a food) they need for normal growth over the course of a week or so.
What you should provide:
- Buying the right food (i.e. foods that are wholesome and healthy), prepared in a healthy way (e.g. cooking and baking is healthier than frying) and served in a creative way. If you don't buy or have sweets and sweetened fizzy drinks/juices in the house, then your child can't eat or drink them and their teeth won't rot. It makes sense, doesn't it?
- A suitable place to sit for the child, e.g. high enough for him to easily reach his plate on the table, and with a footrest so that his feet don't dangle and distract him (which can lead to making mischief).
- A reliable routine for mealtimes with clear boundaries:
- always sit at the same place at the table in a friendly atmosphere
- regular meals: Breakfast, snack, lunch, snack, dinner
- Afternoon snack as interesting and healthy finger food (not chips every day!)
- Eating only while sitting at the table, and not between meals
What you have to DO:
- Sit down to eat: Food and drink are left on the table when the child gets up. This keeps the mess in one place and the children learn to be considerate of those who have to clear up and clean up the food that has been carried around the house.
- Create a calm, relaxed environment with the focus on enjoying the food together, including conversations about the food, where it comes from, who cooked/bought it, who likes what, how much is left, ...
- Stick to 3 meals a day (breakfast, lunch, dinner) and 2 snacks between meals , so that the child has time to play and learn by experimenting - so that the mouth and food are not always the focus. It is very important to help the child to recognize when it is thirsty/hungry and to learn to wait and feel full again after the meal.
- Eating together as a family - every day and as often as possible, and to make family meals as pleasant and positive as possible, and
- Expect irregular eating in a young childand aim for a nutritionally balanced week, not a balanced day
What you should EXPECT:
- New foods: Research shows that children need to be offered new foods more than 19 times (!) before they try or like them. So don't be discouraged by his rejection. Just keep offering him a small amount of new food. Eventually the child will become interested and may or may not like it - or not yet.
- Involve the child in food preparation. The child should help as much as possible with cooking, preparing food, setting the table for everyone (not just themselves!) and clearing up. Do it „together“ at the beginning so that the child can learn by doing.
- Make physical activity a part of your family's daily life. Go to the park or playground every day. Take a walk after eating. This stimulates the child's appetite for healthy food and aids digestion.
What you should NOT do:
- DO NOT eat in front of the TV/iPad! Turn off all electronic screens so your child can engage with their food and talk to you about their food or other things on their mind. (If a toddler only eats with the TV on and/or with the iPhone or tablet, this indicates or may develop into a serious relationship problem and you should definitely get help and advice if you find it difficult to make this change without support).
- NO sweets, snacks and drinks (except water) between meals, as it damages a child's appetite and teeth. This is not really food, because it is full of chemicals and has no nutritional value.
- NO comments about how much or what foods the child eats. Putting pressure on a child to eat something reduces their acceptance of new or different foods.
- Do NOT watch the child all the time or count every spoonful that it puts in its mouth or praise it for it. It is best to eat by yourself. Then the child has company and can see how and what you eat and eat healthily.
- Do NOT take it personally,if the child doesn't like one or other of the meals you have cooked or offered. Being picky is part of a young child's „job“. It's just practicing having its own opinion. But it loves you anyway.
- Give yourself credit, but don't blame yourself!
Remember:
- It is the parents' job to provide a balanced diet and a relaxed family atmosphere.
- Eating and deciding what goes into the child's mouth or body is a matter for the child and NOT the parents.
